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Each day, women across the nation abandon their morals as they share carefully scripted stories with custody evaluators, guardian ad litems, and judges. They don’t want to lie in the courtroom, but they feel there’s no other way to protect their children. Moms dealing with high-conflict exes must create a narrative that doesn’t jeopardize their custody battle.
So they pretend abuse never happened.
These moms conveniently fail to mention hospital visits and police reports that provide a paper trail of their ex’s temper. When a judge asks if there are any concerns about the father’s parenting, many women sadly shake their heads. They hesitate when a guardian ad litem wants to discuss physical, emotional, or sexual abuse toward the children, even if DFS or another agency substantiated the incidents.
It’s just too risky to talk about these things in court.
Society encourages us to leave abusive relationships, comforting us with false hope about the benefits of fleeing. “Protect yourself and your children,” people say, urging women to get away from violent men. “Document everything, and make sure you get police reports. You’ll need it for court.”
But many of these documents never make it to the courtroom. Lawyers often warn women that discussing abuse isn’t…
